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The banishing ritual of The Ultimate Comment


This ritual uses the psychological techniques of visualisation (aided by sound), apnea, symbolism and anchoring to get rid of any unwanted vibes.

  • Dress for ritual. (Always wearing the same clothes when you do magick acts as an anchor, preparing your mind for magick.)
  • Stand with a good posture and deep abdominal breathing.
  • State your intent. e.g. "I banish all fatigue and indecision." (You may choose to state your intent in a language you use only for magickal purposes - Latin, Enochian, Irish, Esperanto, whatever. This is another anchoring mechanism. Make sure it's a cool-sounding language.) If you have no specific intent, skip this bit.
  • Using a magickal weapon or a mudra (symbolic hand position), draw a pentagram in the air as follows:
  • For the first bar of the pentagram, make a very high pitched "Mi" sound and visualize a blue light coming from your head. Feel the sound resonate in your head.
  • For the second bar of the pentagram, make a lower pitched "E" sound and visualize a green light coming from your throat. Feel the sound resonate in your throat.
  • For the third bar of the pentagram, make a lower pitched "A" sound and visualize a yellow light coming from your chest. Feel the sound resonate in your chest.
  • For the fourth bar of the pentagram, make a lower pitched "O" sound and visualize a red light coming from your core. Feel the sound resonate in your core.
  • For the fifth bar of the pentagram, make a very low pitched "Uw" sound and visualize a purple light coming from your perineum. Feel the sound resonate in your perineum.
  • Strike (punch or slap or stab or whatever) through the middle of the pentagram.
  • Repeat the drawing of the pentagram with the miaowing, visualizing and striking in the four cardinal directions.
  • Hold your breath for as long as possible while focusing your mind entirely on your statement of intent. If you did not make a statement of intent, focus on suppressing all thoughts and completely blanking the mind. This step is the key to the whole ritual.
  • If you did that right, you should feel calm, in control and focused. You can anchor this state to a phrase spoken mentally or aloud (one metacommentologist uses "axis mundi"), to a picture or to a gesture.

This ritual works best if you visualize the pentagram and the lights very strongly. So develop your powers of visualization by commentology. It also helps if you understand the symbolism of miaowing, so read the The Miaowndukya Upanishad and the page on miaowing. And the more you practise, the more powerful the ritual will become.