Experiences to be added to the wiki

From The Maze Where Realities Converge - the psychedelic encyclopedia of reality from The Ultimate Comment

Experience: "Smoked some Chamomile" Stoipead 30-05-2005 substances: flowers of chamomile (Anthemis Nobilis) ethanol (Miller Genuine Draft 330ml)

dose: 1 teabag (smoked)

I was on the phone to a friend at around 11pm, and I felt like smoking something to make sleep come quicker, but I possessed nothing other than cigarettes. I'd drank a bottle of miller with dinner earlier, and I was "affected" by it still, though hardly qualifying as tipsy.

So I decided to roll the chamomile teabag on my desk into a cigarette, partially as a displacement activity while I was on the phone. I made an excellent cone shape despite the impossible-to-roll nature of the flowers. When I got off the phone I left the house for a walk, taking the cigarette with me. I lit it and strolled around the estate listening to music, thinking how amusing it would be if I was arrested, and had to insist to the Garda that I was actually smoking chamomile.

The smoke was easy on the mouth but harsh on the throat, in the way that 95% of all of nature's plants seem to be. It had a distinct similarity in taste to chamomile tea, which was hardly surprising.

By the time I had finished smoking the cigarette, I was already searching for any effects. Not expecting much, I checked my field of vision for hallucinations, I checked the music I was listening to for changes, and checked my emotional state against how I had felt before I left. Nothing major was noticed, although I do recall at one point finding it much easier to assess my 3-d vision as if it was a 2-d image (like a cinema screen), for example, I was able to see the road in the middle of which I was standing, whose sides (due to perspective) were converging towards the horizon, as a 2-d triangular shape, which shifted and changed as I walked. I am doubtful as to whether the chamomile caused that.

I decided to compare my experience against that of chamomile tea, which I occasionally drink when I don't feel like any caffeine (after 6pm). I don't find chamomile has any discernible mind calming effect normally, but it does produce a vague emotive feeling to the extent that I could probably guess correctly whether I had drunk chamomile tea or not. In this case, I did experience the feeling, slightly stronger than I would be used to from the tea. It's very possible that this feeling is entirely a result of the flowers' smell and taste.

One effect I often notice after consuming chamomile tea are vaguely euphoric rushes that last about 5 seconds half an hour or so after the tea is drunk...somehow tryptamine like, and "healthy" feeling (as distinct from the "unhealthy" feeling rush of hypoxia, poppers, nicotine or standing up after long periods of sitting. After smoking the chamomile cigarette, I did notice a rush like this, however, I was already smoking a tobacco cigarette at this stage, so I may be confusing the two rushes; although I do assert a distinction between the chamomile and nicotine rush.

I returned home, not exactly disappointed, because it was at least as good as drinking a cup of the same tea....even if it was disgusting

Salvia Tri-J 28-05-2006

I would say that salvia does slow thins down for me, I can beyond doubt feel my heart beat stong & fast. Ill also add that the time loop kicked my cerebelum harder than anything I have ever encountered. Its still the single only time in my life ive belived something which cearly shouldn't be real was actually happening. As if hitting the pipe was the key which opened the culmintaion point of my life. Everything went into & out of me. my ego, id & super ego we all seperated & merged . Ying and yang finally merged together into a grey dew which fell from all directions, drawing together into a tear which chose to direct itself into the tear duct of my third eye. It was gautama born unto the buddha. The Hero's enlightenment.

That lasted a single moment (which seemed endless & with out a beggining) Then I fell over onto the ground....again & again & again & again & again for a while. THough I never actually hit the ground. I fell through the puddles which reflected the demension I was standing in, and into another one. It definitly resembeled the whole two opossing mirror thing. I find it difficult to explain the whole falling through out & into & looking back & forth into different dimensions(I saw at least 3-4 conor's at one stage, not even in a kalidescope way, but he was infront of/behind & all about the place), in text form. So I plan on making a decent diagram at some stage.

DXM & LSD: Together at last Insanoscopic 26-05-2006

together at last.

(8 tablets dxm-240miligrams, 1 tab acid - taken at same time)

taken with three friends, all with same dosage, two did not take acid. we were hanging out in friends apartment.

t+50 mins: feeling highly euphoric and a definite sense of eunoia. t+1hr 20: dxm physical effects set in, for example, a 'sinking ground' sensation when walking around, difficulty manoevering because of muscle tension, hilarious with the euphoria. t+3/4hr: the two who had only taken dxm got tired and went home and noticed when leaving that we were "talking crazy talk"... (they hadn't any experience with acid before).. which leads me to believe that we were discussing quite 'heavy' topics, probably philosophically oriented. t+4-? lots of walking around outside, absolute loss of interest with time which leads to the obvious difficulty of documenting from here onwards.

the dxm's short term memory loss effects prolonged and heightened the insanity, and the acids reality and perception-bending properties lead me to the description of the trip as a six-hour salvia trip. -INSANE-

this parallel to a salvia trip is probably because my mind was racing from the acid followed by my thoughts being completely confused and promptly forgetten , starting the whole cycle again.

quite fun.

It felt like it was lasting for hours and hours. so many thoughts, so many conversations, then poof you've been sucked into something and are hallucinating the shit out of it.

i hallucinated all over your face.

when i stoppped moving and walking, i seemed to overshoot my weight centre and slowly find my centre or gravity by kindof wobbling back to a standing position.... SO hard to describe in words..

slow-release psycholysis following alleged accidental ingestion - stoipéad - 24-05-2006

let me tell you about a stupid friend of mine....

so the dude in question is at this smallish party with some very good friends, and their is a large pile of LSD blotters on the table. he figures "hey, I'll buy one", and does. then he decides to fold it up very tightly in a cigarette paper, seal the paper, and then jokes "what would happen if I put this into my phone instead of a sim card?" and this inspires him to "hide" the blotter in the battery compartment of his phone. all very well.

then ten minutes later, his phone's battery having gone dead, he puts his SIM card into someone else's, so he can text his girlfriend. he then switches the cards back.

shockingly, at 1:00 a.m., he realises that the blotter must have fallen out of the phone when he switched the cards. not a problem, never left the seat... except for one thing. he has a reflex born of hiding the evidence of a cannabis habit from parents, schools etc. if a cigarette paper is not to be used, it is eaten. they don't have a taste, and it solves the problem of their disposal/recycling. he does it so often that he won't remember it.

except in this case, he just accidentally took acid. he's on the northside, and he has work in 13 hours, and hadn't slept the night before. so he kept searching for the paper with the blotter in it, in the hope that it just "fell" and he didn't take it. no such luck though.

what's interesting is that the acid didn't seem to have any effect for a while, and when it happened, despite his having used that acid before and it having very strong effects, it didn't seem strong. so not-strong that he wasn't even sure if he'd taken it. he was quite stoned and tends to hallucinate a fair bit anyway, and he was around a bunch of people who definitely weren't tripping, and also, the blotter was wrapped in a skin very tightly, so perhaps the acid was released very slowly.

what possibly backs up that last idea is that the next day, after a few hours sleep, (he went to sleep 4 hours after the ingestion[?]) he was still getting "acid rushes", and the sensation that his mind was "slowly and non violently being taken apart".

2 days afterwards, he was feelin' fine!

Salvia - Coprophagist 16-04-2005

there's this thing that's been sitting at the back of my mind for the past few months - since i first did 20x salvia at B's. it's like i feel that i'm here for a reason, that i have a mission to fulfill. i don't mean that in a spiritual way, i mean it more in a Quantum Leap way, except i have no hologram dude (what was his name?) or Ziggy to tell me what to do. it's driving me mad, and i've tried to forget it and just live, but i can't. does anyone know what im on about? does anyone know what im supposed to do?

why is it that we feel the need to revaluate all values, why is it necessary to have a mystical experience, an exotic trip, merely to bring back the value to what we have been doing. We go on with the same routine as before, churning out day after day, until we lose sight of the ultimate aim. And the ultimate aim is to do what we have been doing all along, what my fingers are doing right now without me even realizing barely that I'm typing this, what the fuck, this is so fucked up, one can lose oneself in some sort of neurolinguistic trance, it comes from the depths of your brain, but it's part of your brain man, don't chicken out, keep on typing, don't chicken out, what is it that drives me this whole time, what is this invisible force that is moving my fingertips from key to key? It is the will-to-create, put simply, a desire to express whatever trance trance trance I'm in, and in that expression, to give form to a new lease of life just kerploding from my fingertips this is quite a sense of power, to have the whole world, the fates of future generations, laid out before one's fingertips at the keyboard. This here is the new portal of the new Power: the keyboard. It's invisible to you now and will always remain so until I remember a good reason why I'm typing this in the first place, oh, the Dice. They told me to. Not my will, however.... Isn't it funny how people have the habit of not finishing cliches like that: when in Rome [...] leave ellipsis here. The will-to-create, anyway, it's been strong in me from as far back as I can remember. I've always craved originality. What any writer is trying to express is the immediacy of his experience; in a way what he does is to break down the boundaries he has set himself through language. That is, he seeks to convey experience - abstracted into language - through language and back into experience. It is a process of perpetual overcoming, overcoming the grammatical rules that led to this sentence, that led to the beautiful and wondrous set of signifiers that we have joyously invented (and invented is the word) to express our experience. Where lies that boundary between experience and language? Y'know that thing when you look hallucinate at something and it's breathing away and you breathe along with it, extraordinary deep breaths, drawing from the very red force, the stuff that keeps us all running like Duracell bunnies, you can actually see it in your breath if you look. At some point I'm going to have to stop typing and go to bed, but that'll be some faraway colourful new morning. Everything is colourful! Why is it that eveything is so alive, so energetic, so pulsing with new warmth, new life like the morning sun has just come up with its first enhancing beams over the devalued world. What I was trying to say there, some time ago, before I got lost in the acausal/ causal flow, was that we seem to go through the same process of facing the world again and again until we somehow forget why we are doing what we are doing. We need some mystical experience, some brand new meteoric hit, to restore the value to our lives. Although life is a thousand adventures and I don't know why there's cuts on my hands, nor when I'll stop typing, insane! Even if I were to go to sleep now, it would be a colourful sleep, for value has been restored to the earth by our good selves trekking through the city and doing what we do best. I suppose nobody can ever remind you of the value of existence, you must experience the revaluation of all values - it's something that happens on the streets of all our cities, that happens every weekend night with us and our kind around the globe rejoicing in existence and rediscovering the value which we had somehow (how!?) forgotten.

All Hail Triangulon - Peachyelephant - 28-10-2005

Last night was the scariest night of my life. thank the gods for the gods!

Desperate for some relaxing aids, my friend and i (who for the sake of convenience i will refer to as Misa) headed out to Kilmacud on what we innocently called an adventure, getting there on the last luas. ����After a brief stay in our friends house, and getting what we were looking for, (we were at this stage very relaxed) Misa and I prepared ourselves for the homeward journey. Which was to be walking back in to town on the luas tracks, (a foolish thing for two young women to do at 2am on a Wednesday night.) as I was the only one that had a fair idea of where we were and that was the only route i knew. (this was a very fun idea and we had high hopes for a good time)

Laughing and joking, we arrived at the Kilmacud (Cill Mochuda) luas stop and hopped on to the tracks, both nervously noting how eerie and secluded it was. As Misa and I walked, our grips grew tighter, our pace increased and the clattering of the slates beneath our feet became deafening. Petrified, (Completely, totally and utterly. The headline "Womans Throat Slit In City Murder" was firmly planted in my brain. Fruitless escape plans were racing through my mind: Could i use my poi as a weapon? (no. too bouncy) Was i too monged to run? (most definately) Was Misa too fucked up to run?(I hoped not) What weapon would the baddie have?! - by what intsrument would i meet my maker? I was sure that this was the end) we kept going (still smoking - it didnt help with the paranoia) My mind was a solid lump of grim determination to reach the next station and i was desperately searching for any advantages that we had over our unstoppable attacker,(who i was certain i could see every time i turned my head to look) and then i saw something that lifted my heart and made me feel safe: Three depressions on one of the slates on the pathway, subtly reminding me that we had Triangulon on our side and that he would protect us. You have no idea how much better this made us feel. (it was on a par to walking in to the Balally (Baile Amhlaoibh) station and experiencing a rush of warm air on our faces and feeling the lights tough our skin. Ever been suffocated? You know how good the first breath you take after is? THAT'S how it felt.)

Then, deciding not to walk along the tracks anymore, we shuffled slowly and sketchly through Dundrum, and what did we discover?! A Shrine To TRIANGULON!!! I took pictures of this and will post them as soon as possible. Misa and i then continued our intense treck back to the north side, which in total, took THREE!!! hours (the signifigance of three is blinding!) Just to stress how scared we were, by the time we reached Rathgar, it was an excellent idea to pick up and very nicely proportioned stick, in order to beat off any other possible attackers. On our arduous journey, we saw a massive amount of signs that that gods were with us. (some of which i managed to get pictures of and I'll post with the pictures of Triangulon's shrine) We finally got in to bed (it was SO good) after 5am and as i lay there with my best friend by my side, falling asleep to The Doors "The End" i was grateful to the trust in the familiar idea of Triangulon and The Ultimate Comment. Three Sides. Three Angles. One God

Not being stoned - Apr 15 2005 -stoipéad

Substances: T+0: NONE T+2 days: 2 bottles Miller

I would like to document a psychedelic experience that I am currently going through: That of not being stoned. days now, I have stopped myself smoking in an effort to cut down my apparent dependence on this herb. It's surprisingly easy actually. Because it's not like I don't have access to it, but I can definitely last the next 12 or so days I have left of this experiment. There's no visuals off this or anything, and being drunk without being stoned is WAY more fun in my opinion. My sentences fall apart completely, and it's much more eunoiac (no paranoia) than drunk-stoned, which is really too taxing on my energy levels. I'd be interested to know what anyone thinks. I'll be regularly posting to this thread to talk about this.

T + 5 Days:

Noticing a great shift in the perception of time. Time appears to be moving much faster, even though boredom has become more "tangible". I've also become conscious that some of my OEVs, phosphenes and the "rainbow trash noise" are still persisting in my vision despite the complete lack of all psychoactives. Could be HPPD but I would think it's just normal hallucination levels for myself. I'm also noticing a much stronger effect from caffeine and sugar, and a great difficulty sleeping (but that could also be because I haven't been sleeping in the same bed as my wonderful girlfriend for a few nights). I'm combatting this to some extent with 5-HTP (the lack of sleep, not lack of a girlfriend). Also a greatly reduced appetite, but a much greater craving for cigarettes.

Positive effects include a noticeable lack of social paranoia and anxiety, increased energy levels and ability to wake up on time, far better short term memory, better ability to walk and carry out work-type and thinking-type tasks, also coping with the cold weather seems much easier. Also less headaches. I've also noticed that my feeling-tones and personal Zeitgeists and my "sense of era" as well as my have changed in difficult to describe ways

Interesting are the things that are totally unaffected by cessation of cannabis use, and they include my sense of humour, my sense of self worth, my ability to think and act creatively, my libido and my ability to visualise.

I do admit to having a great desire to consume cannabis and for this period of abstinence to be over, though I have discovered the pleasure of drinking one bottle of beer in the evening as an alternative...though it's a lot easier not to drink a beer when I have one than it is to not smoke a joint (obviously, since I am much more relatively dependent on cannabis than alcohol) and I haven't been bothered doing it much.

day 6 now. I'm heading over to B's...and I'll be in a room with my cannabis...it's going to be soo hard not to smoke it. I figure the desire to do it will increase as time passes on the basis of missing it more, but surely the "dependence" will decrease as I get used to not smoking, and won't the impulse decrease with the dependence? So does that mean there's a peak time, when I'll want it the most? Or will I just keep wanting it more and more until I get to the time when I can have it again? I'd say as time passes l'll probably want it more in the way I want a cake now, but less in the way that I want a cigarette.

Dreams: Stoipéád:

1- right....well you see B and I saw the start of CSI: NY in which a body was found in a box on a beach and then watched shaun of the dead on dvd before we went to sleep so this might explain a bit of the themes... but anyway:

so I was in work, and the army called my mobile and said "you have to come back to the 21 Infantry Batallion B Coy[my old company in the reserves] and help us fight off the zombie threat" so I told my colleague chris, "let's get some hammers and fight these zombies! (there's loads of hammers in the shop). So we went outside and chased zombies around for ages, but there were none, so that was shit. turns out they were all killed months ago.

so I headed down to a beach (very like the beach from lost) and with some friends uncovered a big black bin sack containing a skull, loads of different brands of duty free cigarettes, my mp3 player (which I lost months ago) and a letter. the letter said "I died in this sack. please take my stuff". Also the sack had the most pimpin' jacket in the whole world...I mean it was a black 3/4 length thing of felt, silk, suede and with solid gold trimmings. So I took the cigarettes and the jacket and headed to UCD (for some reason) and sat around wearing this kick ass jacket smoking crazy cigarettes...it was so good

2- Every night for the last week I've dreamed about missing the first day of college. Last night I even had a time table...and the only class I had that day was called "Right Wing" and it was highlighted in red.

Lauramary:

that jacket sounds deeeeeeeadly I didnt like the dream I had at the weekend, it was actually about everyone from the ultimate comment, but i had just watched eyes wide shut before going to bed so that might explain the fucked up orgy-fest at the end . I don't know what any of you guys look like in person but in this dream we were all like something from a 1920's musical...all smoking but using the long and oh so elegant ciggerette holders and wearing the most un-revealing , leave everything to the imagination, sorta swimwear. I wish i could explain though why I thought the dream was so horrible...it was just very fucked up....

Insanoscopic

1- I had a dream last night that i was in a friends house, and there was some drinking going on, with many people involved. then BrianTwin asked me to come into the kitchen with him to "speak privately".. he said that he had some 'serious smoke' that i'd be interested in. he took out a small metal container, the size of a matchbox and gave it to me.. it was a small block of some crazy-assed THC-like shit... i asked "how much?" he said "two grand".. at that moment, a 'garda' walked into the kitchen and i flipped the block behind my back, he searched me, let me go and then did his thing in the house while i fucked off home to wind down.... i also had a dream the other night that my friend was raped by BrianTwin.... insane

2-I had a dream two nights ago that I was playing guitar (filling in for a sick guitarist) for Green Day.. in Rathcoole Community Centre which was insane. then one of the singer dudes was like "yeah, i forgot the words for the next song, distract the crowd for about five minutes or so while i refresh my memory" so i fiddled with my guitar for ages.. so weird

Tri-J: I remember a dream where me and my brother were packing ice sculptures of dead people I didn't know into the back of a car. I drove the car with another version of my self ,who was bald wearing black jeans & a tight black turtle neck sweater, in shotgun & we had a conversation about nuns. Then I ran over another version of myself on the road. Me & I got out of the car to look at dead me. I said "thats funny" bald turtle neck me said "No its not".

Then we started biting telephone wires together so both wires placed together at the mouth would make an x shape. We both found this extremely interesting & I remember feeling relivied that we had found some common ground after our dissagreement earlier

Blowfish:

I had a dream last night that P, S and a few others were in my house in W and managed I fell asleep watching something on the TV. When I woke up they told me they were very sorry but they'd damaged the carpet a bit. I walked out to find all the carpet that used to be in the hall in a big pile in the kitchen. Then Jambo turned up with about 20 random people and started pulling up the floorboards. I got really pissed and threw them all out...never did get to see what my parents had to say about it all!

A few hours later I had another dream (as a background, yesterday in pharmacology class I was instructed to cut the head off a rat and take out the brain. The rat wasn't quite dead so needless to say I refused, not wanting to kill a rat for a needless experiment when thirteen others were already doing it. I was also sleeping last night with a cat on top of me so that might explain a bit more...)

Anyway, in my dream I was called up to the head of pharmacology's office to discuss my refusal to carry out various massacres. I made a good case for myself but was given out to and ridiculed by him. He then went into the back of his office and took out this gas cylinder containing a cat with its head sticking out. This was a special breed of cat bred to live in tiny gas cylinders. Anyway, he made me hold the cat while he injected a concoction called "PURE AGONY" into it. It was green and had a really weird gassy smell. Apparently, the purpose of the entire experiment was first of all to determine if I had the balls to continue doing pharmacology and also to determine whether talking to the cat, hugging it or stroking its head would do the most to distract it from the pain. Then I woke up to find the cat on my face. THE END.

(all true)...Meow. Said cat also tried to follow me to college the next morning. I had to distract it with a piece of string and run in the other direction.

2 - Mine was some years ago after watching an episode of Neighbours where a tarantula came out of a tissue box left lying on a bed while whoever was in the bed was asleep. In my version though it was a little eggbox creature that came out of the tissue box. Its body was made out of an entire eggbox and it had little eggbox feet. It crawled out of an empty tissue box which was sent to me as a birthday present from some randomer. I then spent the rest of the dream crawling up the walls (I could walk up walls and across the ceiling) trying to escape the eggbox monster because if it touched you once the sting would kill you. Eventually I think I fell out of bed and woke up...beware of eggboxes!

San Fransisco Church of Scientology - Conor - 31.07.2005

So me and J.J. are walking to this free jazz festival in the 'sco and we notice this building with a sign saying Church of Scientology. "Ah," we think, "there's a decent cult." I n we go and this guy called Frank from Waterford is working there and he offers to give us this two-minute introductory talk on Scientology. He talks about L. Ron Hubbard, renaissance man, writing science fiction, sailing, studying psychology and psychiatry and inventing 'dianetics', the scientific study of how the mind affects the body, which then evolves into Scientology. Scientologists do this form of therapy called 'auditing', in which you are regressed to the roots of your psychological problems, then you comment on them and 'poof', they're gone. When you join the church, you go through auditing until you're declared 'Clear', which is like being a sort of Higher Man, and you also learn how to audit others. So we listen to his talk and ask him a few things and he suggests that we watch a video called 'Orientation'. We're put in a pitch dark room with a big screen and very loud surround sound. This indoctrination video starts booming at us about the history of the church, Hubbard etc. Frank from Waterford had warned us, "It's a bit of a hard-sell at the end." That was quite the understatement, as it turned out. Some gems from the video: It turns out there's this luxury ocean liner owned by the church that sails around the world. Only the highest-ranking Scientologists get to go there. L. Ron Hubbard is praised with such phrases as 'the greatest friend humanity ever had'. An auditor says traditional psychology and psychiatry are completely false. He says psychologists and psychiatrists need psychiatric help, because that would shut them up. Get it? He also says "When you look at all the benefits of Sicentology, you'd have to bee a raving lunatic to say no to it." This woman appears on the screen and says, "Scientology has imroved my life immeasurably" or something like that. She is then followed by anothher and another and another person singing the praises of scientology. They include that actress who had post-natal depression ("Without Scientology, I'd be dead", John Travolta ("There's not an area of my life that Scientology hasn't helped" and even Isaac fucking Hayes. The hard-sell at the end was pricelesss. The narrator says "You stand on the threshold of your next trillion years. You can choose to live it in cold agonizing darkness or you can step triumphantly into the light. You could leave this room now and walk out and never think of Scientology again... but that would be stoopid! You could also jump off a bridge or blow your brains out." (They really said all this.) "The choice is yours, not ours. If you choose Scientology, we'd be happy with you, and you'd be happy with you." Then the doors on the screen open to this heavenly light and the film ends. We ask to take these psychological tests they give. The tests consist of 200 questions like 'If we invaded another country, would you feel sorry for conscientious objectors in the other country?' The test results showed us to be both desparately unhappy ill-balanced unstable individuals, and we were shown the improvement in the tests people sahowed after auditing. I should have asked how the results compared to a control group. It is a very classy building and there were posters up showing various tenets of the church, such as a scale of aliveness or something, where zero is physical death, 1.5 is 'covert hostility', 9 is anger, up to 40, which is peace of mind or something. Frank from Waterford started trying hard to convince us to spend $35 to take an auditing course, which would almost certainly make us much healthier and happier and raise our IQ, and we kept trying to refuse. It was interesting that we walked into a church and ended up having to fend off a salesman.

So that's Scientology. We plan on trying to find a chapter of Raelianism or some such and hooking up with them. Note how me and J.J. have invented the original adventure of culthopping, akin to the thing in Fight Club with the support groups.

New York's a-go-go and everything tastes right - Conor - 30-05-2005

New York is big city with big buildings, big cars, big ads, big business ad great big people. Unlike many other big cities where you find people are uneccesarily rude in public (London comes to mind), New York has the opposite problem, everyone's so unwilling to offend, they could use a healthy dose of rudeness. America is often criticized for 'bad taste'. TThis is wrong not only because good and bad taste died thirty years ago, but because while one can sneer at bad taste when it takes the form of a keyring or a mode of dress, when people start building billion-dollar towers of bad taste, one can only tip one's hat to a dedication to the ideal that is truly herculean. I've been to the MoMA on acid, which blew out my mind three or four times over. Picasso, Dali, Pollock, Warhol, Matisse, Magritte, can't remember them all. (Looking at the originals of The Persistence of Memory [Dali's melting clocks] and Illumined Pleasures on acid, a million miles from home, in an art nouveau temple of deadliness, in the happeningest city in the world. Imagine it!) At one point I considered storming the museum by force and taking it over, so I could throw some good drug parties. Decided I was outnumbered The other night I was at CBGB, the club that launched The Ramones, Blondie, The Talking Heads, and I think The New York Dolls, among others. Now it's full of teenyboppers dressed exclusively in black T-shirts with live music of the sort where at least one instrument is just wailing away tunelessly for the sake of volume at any given time. I befriended the staff of a vintage clothing store that sells the best T-shirts I have ever seen in my born puff. I walked in and they were discussing the death of the Russian poet Pushkin in a duel. I thought, here are New Yorkers with wicked styles, an intellectual edge (russian poetry) and a taste for insane deadliness (stories about duelling). The people here are generally ugly. They seem to be put together wrong. If they're not plain fat, their heads are shrinking into their necks, or their arms are to short or something. They compensate by building big shiny stuff.

Gotta go, my time's up here.

Dicebidding for pop art on mescaline - Conor - 29-06-2006

The story starts on Monday. I was to have dinner with some out-of-town friends of the family. I find low doses of psychedelics (half the dose for a trip) disinhibits me and makes me a better conversationalist, so I brewed up a thing involving 10g of that cactus powder (25-30g being a trip). Then the guests cancelled, so I was left with this psycholytic medicine brew. I figured any time I felt like taking it, I'd roll the die, and take it when a one came up. At about 3:30am that night, I rolled and whaddaya know, it's a one. The craziest time of a man's life are those few seconds between the time you wake up and the time you remember you took mescaline before going to bed. I dreamt about running around some city for two miles, painting everything white, singing a catchy song with an excellent rhyming scheme, all about running around some city for two miles, painting everything white. I spent the day being pro-active, gettting my beureacratic shizzat together and getting away with being on drugs. Saw Batman. I'd read in Los Tiempes Irlandes that there was this auction at half-six In James Adams Salesrooms on the Green, featuring three works by a guy called Pietro Psaier who was in The Factory with Warhol. I am very fond of pop art, as you know, and I'd been in James Adams' a few days before, so it didn't feel like entirely unexplored territory. I figgered I'd go along. Also, I have more money than I oughta these days, because of the non-actuallization of my holiday. I, like most 1st year students, don't go to art auctions much. I didn't fit in perfectly with the crowd, needless to say, who were mostly middle-aged philistines with those dour faces where it looks like the jowls have collapsed around the mouth like defective lungs collapse. The feeling of being out of place made me more gonzo than awkward. In the movies there is this fantasy of a scene that looks like rich people swimming around in their wealth and doing all the gorgeous, hedonist, decadent things you can do when you're rich; but behind the revelry there are workings of immense power in the balance, and the fates of nations are decided. (Think casinos or cocktail parties in spy movies.) Auctions are like a scaled-down version of that - people gathered together in nice surroundings, acting sophisticated and urbane, but actually fighting each other and pitting power against power. Needless to say, I used to dice to decide my bids. If I saw a piece I liked, I'd pull the die out, and if it was a one, I'd bid up to 300, but I was really waiting for Psaier's pieces to come up. Thankfully, I was always outbid on these. The first two of Psaier's pieces I bid for, but was outdone by an anonymous phone-bidder. (Of course, everyone there was far, far richer than me.) On the third (and by far the coolest) piece, entitled Happy Birthday, Mr. President, they didn't stretch far enough to leave me behind, so I ended up with the piece below for 450. I'm picking it up tomorrow.

insane trip to cork - Insanoscopic

last weekend, the trip to cork finally happened.

on sunday night, myself and Cogar and an injured friend (sprained ankle) visited eight polish crazies. upon arrival, seven of us consumed ten grams of philosophers stones each and proceeded to drink alcohol.

cider was my first tepple.. the polish nutters then repeatedly handed me shots of jack daniels and some obscure rum. it was about an hour or two into the mush/alcohol fest when someone broke out the blotters- Hoffman 2000's.. cut into quarters, (as there were four tabs left and only so many partyers)

i ate a quarter and then proceeded with the proceedings of drinking rum before heading off on some INSANE adventure to find cannabis..

bearing in mind that it was about 03:30 on a monday morning on a very desolate road and it was pitch dark and we had to wheel the injured party in a wheelchair (that we didnt intend on ACTUALLY using) and there were about eleven of us ... drunk... and very tripping.

we walked about 3 miles down the road to a party consisting of stoners watching lesbian porn...

novices...

after brief spliffage, Cogar and myself decided we'd go our separate ways from the party... we wheeled the injured friend to her home (another mile or two) and then Cork was our oyster.

we got to watch fishing boats sail out at about 5 in the morning, and everything coming to life around us...

it seemed like the right thing to do was to take a pill... split playstation.

it was good to me and coming up on it was very gradual and calming...

we chilled on a hilltop, watching the sleepy fishing village coming to life, then walked to Cogars house, getting home at 09:30 monday morning.

on monday night, we went to the pub... after a few drinks, we made our way out to a lighthouse, bringing with us a few pint bottles of cider, we sat under the lighthouse at about one or two in the morning drinking and watching the lights scan across the sea...

twas a pretty good weekend

(we were spotted wheeling a girl through the quiet village at whatever it was 03:00 or something in a wheelchair completely off out metaphorical nut, the following day, everyone in the village seemed to know about it.. people in the pub the next night and stuff... insanity)

Paranoia solved...ha! - Cogar - 1-06-2005

I remmeber last summer, everytime i was in a stoned state, I always saw this blackbird. Slowly, it became my stalker. my conscience. every bad thing in this world manifested into one being that glared at me constantly. (on a "duh" level, I live around a lot of woods. there are a lot of blackbirds here!). But one day, once again i saw the blackbird and I started screaming like fuck at it: what came out was this:

"One for sorrow, a black tomorrow twitch your feathered black at me Satans wretch. A solid stare, a poisonous share, Tonight you'll feel my wrath.

Doveless feathers now haunt me Birdless plummage flocks to my sleep. One for sorrow, a black tomorrow And yesterday was none."

The fucker of a bird flew away

Mushies - Insanoscopic - May 12 2005

on monday i ate 12 grams of philosopher's stones.

thank you [certain headshop].

the most noticeable thing that happened was a vast awareness of my mind. this happened during a closed-eye trip. i became aware that the trip was taking place in my mind, and that, dimensionally, there were no limits to it. the physical world became really irrelevant. in that sense, it was pretty spiritual. i was thinking of myself as a small spark of energy within my brain, that was who i was.. my mind. i definitely had a sense that what i was, the 'energy'... was, or would be connected to bigger things.

very very highly confused though. more confused than ive ever been on mushies. i couldnt roll a joint, and when i got someone to roll me one, i was getting 'sucked into it' and it would either go out or hotrock all over the place. i also couldnt make out the shape of the joint, i thought it was triangular, because of the geometric patterns...

nothing had smooth edges also, everything was fuzzy, and when i looked closer at things, their edges repeated on to infinity.. which was cool.

...and they taste horrible.

My first couple trips on Philosopher's Stones - CissyMalfoy - 16.02.2006

My friends and i had been discussing and planning our long awaited first trip on mushrooms. We had decided to take them during the day, we freaked that maybe at night we might see dark shit an get really paranoid.We had food, music, everything.

We bought the mushrooms and came back to mine. We took them with two friends who were remaining sober, more as observers than anything else. They tasted awful. A bit like a mix between conkers and wood. To be honest they didnt really have a taste, it was more the texture than anything else. We all had a metallic tingling feeling in our mouths. We constantly discussed how we felt.

Eventually, my two friends started to see stuff, dont know what, but they couldnt stop laughing. They were totally on the same level, of complete uncontrollable laughter. I sat there quiet, observing life, as though i had seen it all for the first time. I couldnt stop crying, and it was like i was leaking from every orriface constantly. The three of us had the same problem. Thank god i had tissues...

It was at this point that i knew i was having a completely different trip to them. I (who am normally very extroverted and loud) became withdrawn. I didnt speak for about 3-4 hours. My friends got real worried. Eventually something happened that got me real angry. All of a sudden i was full of rage. I yelled my friends into a somewhat sober state. I nearly ripped out all my hair. (The sounds of my roots ripping could be heard by everyone)We calmed down, and decided to go out. I rolled a joint an paced. Once the joint was gone, i constantly felt like i had to be smoking. So i did.

When outside, nature, life, everything, all became very obvious, and more beautiful than i had ever seen it. "All the worlds a stage" i kept saying, staring into bushes by a river. It was amazing.

We eventually came back to mine where after another joint we faded and called it a night. The next day, i was perfectly fine. No hangover. No headache. In fact i was in a great mood.

The next time i took Philosophers Stones, we were all on them, bar a friend who turned up with all the tunes. I ate mine slow but constantly till they were all gone. This time i used water to wash them down. Much easier that way.

Within the space of about an hour, i had this sick feeling in my stomach, but my frineds reassured me that it would eventually go, and it did. We were listening to Roni Size (techno rave) and i think it only helped to intensify my trip.

This time i knew it would be diferent. I was sitting on the floor at the end of my bed listening to my friends conversations, while watching my wall breathe with me. It was so cool. One of my friends was seeing the exact same thing, and we were giggling together at it. My wall is covered in photos and postcards and they were all curling in at the corners then returning to there natural shape, constantly.

My thoughts were running wild, constantly analyzing everything. It was like that all night. It was weird. It was like i couldnt think and talk at the same time, so because thinking was easier than talking i hardly spoke. But when i did, i was totally aware of the fact that I WAS SPEAKING.

What else did i see? At one point i looked at the floor at the corner of my bed, and saw a dog (It was a Pug, in case you were wondering). My bed was like liquid. It kept moving everywhere. It wasnt major, at times i had to stop and think, am i seeing this for real, like cus of the drugs, or am i just thinking and convincing myself it was actually moving.

Later on that night (we had decided that it would be cool to take them at night, if not better..)we ventured outside. I live near a green area surounded by houses, with loads of really old trees dotted all around it. We found a spot by a tree (which someone continued to climb..). There was a perfectly clear sky, and all the stars shone bright against the black of the night. It was so beautiful. Everything was. Like it was taken out of a landscape picture book. I found a spot and lay there, not caring about the dampness. I lit a cigarette and watched as the more obvious stars moved constantly around their own spot. I blew the smoke into the air, and i was reminded of that shot of Leonardo DiCaprio, smoking a cigarette against the setting sun, in Romeo And Juliet. I was filled with a pure joy, inside and out.

We ventured down to a favourite spot to sit, right by the main road into the town. The junction was like a turning point in our lives. The cars like passing thoughts. All these people were going somewhere. They all had LIVES. Everthing that encompassed our vision was made by SOMEONE. Everything. The road. The bricks that make up the houses. The chewing gum stuck to the pavement. The skins around our joints. Everything. It was the most overwhelming feeling of Woah. Now at this point we were probably about 5hrs into the trip. We all felt amazing.

Mind you, i still wasnt talking. Just admiring everything, and thinking. Seriously, it almost pissed me off. They dont call them "Philosophers" Stones for nothing y'know.

Eventually it was about 2 am and we were all wrecked, wet from the constant leaking, and wanted bed, because after much discussion it was the most amazing place in existance, just for the simple fact that it is an essential part of life.

Oh and, before i finish, about 3hrs into the trip, i also so this Yellow Submarine-esque cartoon of an old man in the window. I kept staring at him. Any time i told people about him, they just laughed. But then, i was watching him, and all of a sudden wing like curves, just whooshed up, then whooshed back down, and the angry man was gone. I didnt see him again that night. I got such a shock, i was sort of muttering words of fear to myself, which in turn shocked my friends into believing that i had actually seen something. (Drug induced perhaps, but i saw it...)

Thanks to Tom, Aidan, Cat, Lucy and lets not forget Stephen for those wicked tunes, and that sub-whoofer an speakers. I had a wicked time. Ill be doing them again, for definate. Im 20, why not?

(What was it like when you weren't talking for hours?)

It was so weird. The first time, when two of my friends were on completely the same level, i did withdraw completely. I think i thought that the mushrooms werent havng an effect on me, and i freaked. I remeber staring out my window onto the street for ages. I was staring at the piping on the side of the house opposite, trying to convince myself i was having hallucinations. In a way i guess, i was willing it to happen. I think it may have have changed colour, and or shook, but it was like i was entranced. I think this made me realise that i was actually tripping, because i became aware of how intensely i was thinking about thinking. I just withdrew to my own random thoughts, all fleeting, of course... When i was standing, i wanted to lie down, and likewise, when i was lying down, i wanted to stand. When i stood, i just swayed. Standing still was not an option. I couldnt. I just swayed, and stared, lost in thought.

I am a bit of a neat freak, so when an ashtray was knocked onto the white carpet, i just lost it. I screamed and screamed all of a sudden, full of rage, and determination to well and truly break my silence. It was like i had just remembered how to speak. But i was ushered to the floor, and handed a cigarette. I calmed down, but needed to release anger. i clenched my fists and then moved to my hair. At first i just gripped and clenched my hair in my hand. Then i started to pull, wanting to feel the pain, realising that it didnt hurt as much as i thought. So i ripped and pulled, hard. When my roots could be heard ripping (literally), i had to stop. not because i discovered the pain, but because i feared for my hair. One friend (the one who sat me down and gave me the smoke) looked into my eyes, which were apparently black as black, with yellow and red rings around my iris. I really wanted to see them! But didnt..

It wasnt fun, but i think the fact that i wasnt speaking, was because i believed i was still in a somewhat sober state. It didnt help, but thats where i learned about self preparation before taking mushrooms. I realised that i needed to be in an agreable mood, talkative, up for a laugh etc. if i was to enjoy the experience fully. It also didnt help that, because it was our first time on mushrooms, and having believed that we couldnt expose ourselves to the public in such states, we stayed in my bedroom, for mthe majority of the trip. We felt trapped in a way. But, after much persuasion on my behalf, we went out. It was then, when i was relaxed, that i began to have hallucinations... the rest is all above...

Salvia, wow... - Jimmeh - 01-05-2006

Tried it for the first time yesterday(5x), a continuos fit of laughter for about 3 minutes. Had my hands over my eyes at the start and wen I took em down I saw the pattern of my hands on the couch and the curtains, then I thought I was in a kitchen(although I was in a sitting room), looked around at a table and saw my friends there, but they were really big and I felt like I was sinking into the couch......

Also my skin got really sensitive, a bit uncomfortable.. Gotta do this shit again soon, how the fuck is it legal and so cheap??( 15 for 1g!)

Yeah, I was reponsible with it and only took about .1 g each having researched it for about 2 weeks prior to doing it(thank you, internet). 20x would probably be harder to measure out and easier to take too high a dose, won't be moving onto that til I've a couple of 5x trips under my belt.

I did it with two other friends present(we took it in turns). I actually did it first and nothing much happened(gravity was more intense, skin was more sensitive and slight feeling that the room was closing in on me but not laughing fit), but I'd exhaled too early. My friend didn't do it entirely right the first time either, he just had a laughing fit with slight CEVs. My other friend, however, had one intense trip, he was laughing and then rolled off the couch apparently to get into another world that was below him and then started rolling around on the floor crying(we feared it might have been a bad trip, but it wasn't, he was sad he didn't get into the world or something). Then I did it again(1st post) and my 1st friend did it again too, this time he thought he was a sail on a boat(the couch was a boat) and he was the wallpaper trying to grab me into the wallpaper or something. This was the first time for us all.... Maybe you weren't inhaling right or you had stuff that wasn't very potent?

Insanoscopic and the Bad Seeds - Insanoscopic -06-05-2006

Had the worst trip of my life last thursday; i'll update this post when i get time. it was all down to those little morning glory seeds.. they made me; having a stroke, dead, decaying, that thing that happened to tom cruise in vanilla sky happened to me, that thing that happened to edward norton in fight club happened to me, that thing that happened to christian bale in the machinist happened to me, i was stoip ad and my memories were a figment of his imagination, i was tri-j, i was my girlfriend (who was sleeping beside me, so i was a siamese twin for a while), i was me and the past few weeks were a simulated reality while i rotted in limbo because i died from taking too many pills a few weeks ago. i was a physical vegetable and my mind couldnt cope with it so i just imagined a face (the one i have now) to hide the reality that was obviously too harsh for my mind to cope with... etc etc. i woke up my girlfriend at the point when i had my head in my hands and i was saying "NO! NO! NOOO!"

How I beat anxiety and stopped worrying about the bomb - autocentron - 24-05-2006

The answer was to fuck with my head until i worked out what was wrong.

I haven't felt alive for longer than a minute or two for about 5 years until last night. The story of the day, condensed, goes:

Woke up at puppy's. Went to town. Bought hair dye. Had inspiration from last night to buy some morning glory seeds in a headshop (lovely people I'm going back to thank them in the next few days). Got home around 4, lala, ate food just before 6, at the seeds at 6. Cue mounting insanity. Ended up watching the Wall (Pink Floyd film thing) and getting just a little involved. Went onto msn afterwards, started talking to puppy and marla, then started getting a bit panicked and paranoid. But my mind was working on it and suddenly I freaked out and a dam burst, in a way, and my mind got out. I realise now that for the past... ages... I've been living in a small corner of my mind, distanced from everything, in a bubble as it were, albeit one with goddamn strong walls which reinforced themselves.

I retired to bed because I didn't know what else to do I didn't want to scare people any more, cause I'd been freaking out to them a bit, but my mind wouldn't stop (I had, before MSN, ingested an amount of caffeine which I have no idea of, and that made my mind relentless). It was a knot, a headwrecking knot, but worrying it and worrying it made it suddenly and spontaneously untangle. The answers came to me, that I was being a frickin idiot, in the words of napoleon dynamite, and lalala anyway let's not go into those details, suffice to say although I slept only about two hours and had a horrible moment waking up where I thought it had all disappeared, I'm HAPPY!!!!

Nootropics - Conor - 10-08-2006

Actually kinda work. I was skeptical about the claim of drugs improving memory, concentration, creativity and general sharpness, because it's so prone to the placebo effect, but I've been taking Idebenone pretty regularly - six doses a day of something like 35-50 mg (my scales aren't accurate enough) - for a week or two now in the run-up to my exams and I'm pretty sure there's more going on than placebo. My cognitive faculties may be enhanced, but over and above that I'm noticing improved creativity; I've basically been in a bright, creative mood non-stop for two weeks. The effect being on creativity rather than memory, concentration or calculation may be specific to my brain or specific to this drug. I don't know. The frequency with which creative ideas strike me is actually annoying; whatever I'm doing is constantly interrupted by the need to reach for a notepad and scribble down an idea, but never look a gifthorse in the mouth, eh? Another problem is with sleeping; I'm so alert it makes it hard to suspend thought for long enough to doze off. Overall it's definitely a case of Better Living Through Chemistry. I may keep on this stuff in the long haul, but I may reduce the dosing after the exams. www.bulknutrition.com have the best prices I've seen.

http://www.smart-drugs.net/JamesSouth-idebenone.htm